You promised me forever.

Your tears will never fall like rain, watching me walk the isle. I'll never wear your ring on my finger, or that white wedding dress.

Not for you.

Because hopes of forever and a none chocolate wedding cake are gone.

Gone with you.

We'll never put up our own tree, or hang worn out stockings in our cheep apartment. Because you'll never love me, and we'll never share sheets again.

You will never be my valentine. No amount of paper hearts can change that. But I still cut them out.

You won't be the one I tell my daughters about. You won't keep the title of my one and only. I'll take that back, someday.

You'll be striped of your honor and banished from my kingdom.

Someday my knight in shining armor will wear diapers, and he'll call me mommy. His Daddy will be the kindest king there ever was. And I'll be Queen of our castle.

I will be happy.


And you won't cross my mind.

I'll cross yours. She'll insist on chocolate, and you'll miss me.

Your preacher will ask for objections, and it'll will be you who can't find peace much less hold it.

Because in your head it's my innocent kiss you long for. It's my smile you miss, and my love you wish for on every star.

It's my void you can't fill.

And you'll run, and run, and run. The way you should have ran after me.


I'll be in Jamba Juice. With a toddler in my stroller, and a baby in my belly. My ring will sparkle, and my face will glow. "Because it's a girl" the cashier says. And you'll see, everything you let go of.

Your tears will fall like rain. And your heart will break, just like mine did so many years ago.